Winklevoss Twins Try IPO (Again), This Time Without Releasing Gemini Financials–Sounds Legit…

The Winklevoss twins are giving Wall Street another chance to buy the top of a mania, and this time it’s not a rowing machine company or “Harvard social network for grownups.” Gemini, the crypto exchange founded by the two human Amazon Echoes known as Cameron and Tyler, just slipped a confidential IPO filing to the SEC… because showing your numbers is so last decade. 

(Source: Giphy) 

In short, Gemini waits for the SEC to drop their investigation (check), pays a $5 million “please go away” fine to the Commodity Futures Trading Commission (check), then starts quietly assembling bankers and lawyers for a public debut. They have not disclosed how many shares, what price, or whether this is the “row to the moon” moment… only that they’ll go public “after the SEC completes its review process, subject to market and other conditions.” Translation: If Circle’s post-IPO turns into a bagholder massacre, look for the Gemini twins to suddenly get really interested in private equity. 

Speaking of Circle, the stablecoin issuer went public last week, instantly pulling off a 1999 dot-com impersonation, tripling in its first two days of trading. Suddenly the entire crypto sector is bullishly horned up as every VC from Miami to Singapore is dusting off their old IPO shoes. Even Mike Novogratz moved Galaxy Digital from Toronto to Nasdaq, presumably so people would stop asking him about weed stocks.

(Source: CNBC) 

But alas, Gemini’s timing isn’t just about the market. The Trump administration has thrown open the regulatory floodgates, promising to play nice with crypto so Donnie Politics can keep rug pulling meme coins (jk)... so the frenzy is in the air. Meaning, since Gemini is still the “straight-laced” exchange, the one that runs Super Bowl ads about regulation and puts up billboards reminding Wall Street that “the next generation financial system is here to stay.”... they’re playing teacher's pet to ensure they can cash out with zero obstacles. For reference, Gemini is like Coinbase with less SEC baggage and more matching puffer vests… and they even hired Affirm’s Dan Chen as CFO for the final pre-IPO spit-shine.

(Source: Giphy) 

As for the financials, don’t even ask. Again, that’s the privilege of a confidential filing: you don’t have to show your homework while you’re busy shopping the deal to every hedge fund with a Robinhood account. And yet, Gemini’s blog posts are flooded with the following: “macro tailwinds,” “pending stablecoin legislation,” and “institutions embracing digital assets.” In other words, “please forget 2022 ever happened.” 

My take on the matter? If you’re hoping for a sober IPO in a sector where Coinbase trades like a leveraged Bitcoin ETF and Circle’s stock chart looks like a meme, you’re going to be disappointed. This is a straight-up grab for liquidity while the SEC is distracted and sentiment is euphoric. If it works, Cameron and Tyler finally get their Wall Street bags that Zuck stole from them. If not, they can always go back to litigating against Zuck or selling NFTs of their Harvard rowing team LOL. 

(Source: Giphy) 

In the end, IPOs are back… and the craze is just getting started. Meaning, keep your eyes on this story and for more details (minus the financials) to come out. Oh, and place your bets accordingly. Until next time, friends…

At the time of publishing this article, Stocks.News holds positions in Amazon and Robinhood as mentioned in the article.