As if Bitcoin wasn’t already having a rough go, the biggest short-seller of all time just chimed in. In a Substack post on Monday, Michael Burry warned that Bitcoin’s slide could turn into a self-feeding “death spiral,” especially for companies that spent the last year stuffing their balance sheets with it. Bitcoin is now down about 40% from its October high. And for Burry, that’s kind of the point. When things got tense, gold and silver moved higher. Bitcoin...
Not all heroes wear capes… Well, it appears that America finally bullied a Fortune 50 company into blinking… and now, snackflation is getting walked back. Pepsi says it’s cutting retail prices up to 15% on Lay’s, Doritos, and Cheetos across the U.S., starting basically now. Why? Because all God's people said… In short, this decision didn’t come from a glorified think tank. It came from consumers absolutely spamming Pepsi with co...
Texas Instruments (NASDAQ: TXN) is reportedly in advanced discussions to acquire Silicon Laboratories (NASDAQ: SLAB) in a transaction that could value the semiconductor designer at roughly $7 billion, according to a person familiar with the matter. While no agreement has been finalized, the source said an announcement could come as soon as the coming days, though negotiations remain subject to change and could still fall apart. News of the potential transaction sent Silicon Laboratories share...
You might think your job is stressful, but there’s no chance it’s tougher than being the PR person for my 16-year-old self’s former employer right now. The Old Country Store that tried to reinvent itself and accidentally lit $94 million in market value on fire is back with a new corporate brainwave: employees on business trips should eat at Cracker Barrel… mostly Cracker Barrel… and preferably nothing but Cracker Barrel. According to an internal memo sco...
Hey Siri, how do you say “Art of the Deal” in Hindi? Donnie Deels hopped on Truth Social yesterday and announced he and India’s PM Narendra Modi just “got it on” (in a good way). We have tariffs down, big numbers being thrown around, energy is suddenly rerouted… and everybody is smiling in different time zones. Bigly. In short, according to #47, reciprocal U.S. tariffs on India are dropping from 25% to 18%, effective immediately. India,...
Gold and silver suffered their worst crash since 1980 on Friday, abruptly ending a powerful rally that had driven precious-metals prices to record levels over the past several months. Gold futures fell as much as 11%, dropping below $4,900 per ounce, while silver plunged more than 25% in a single session. Spot gold recorded its largest one-day decline in the last 40 years, a sharp reversal after an extended period of steady gains. The pullback followed weeks of relentless upside momentum....
Funding Favors secured… Tesla’s board walked into court asking for mercy and received a happy ending instead. In a ruling that can only be described as spiritually violent, Delaware’s top court just took a machete to a nine-figure legal fee tied to Tesla’s board pay mess. The shareholder lawyers wanted $176 million. The court said $71 million. Please enjoy your economy seat. (Source: Giphy) For context: this all stems from a derivative lawsuit ch...
Chevron Corp. (NYSE: CVX) said Thursday it has approved a new increase to its quarterly dividend, lifting the payout by roughly 4% as the energy major continues to prioritize shareholder returns despite softer free cash flow trends. The company’s board raised the quarterly dividend to $1.78 per share, up from $1.71, bringing Chevron’s annual dividend to $7.12 per share. The new dividend will be payable on March 10 to shareholders of record as of February 17. The increase marks Che...
While Elon schemes up another way to bait and switch Tesla bros into thinking the robotaxi is finally here (read: claims no humans in cars anymore but moves that supervisor to another car following the robotaxi)... Waymo’s actually live in too many cities to count on both hands… and now they’re pushing to really put the pressure on Donald Trump’s ex BFF. (Source: Financial Times) According to people familiar with the deal (translation: folks who’ve actua...
Does your investment criteria include “legacy fintechs getting pantsed by Apple Pay in real time?” Buddy, I’ve got a ticker for you… Happy earnings season to everyone except for the folks currently shaking at their desks inside PayPal HQ. Elon’s old flame just got charged back to the tune of roughly 17% off the stock, after their numbers revealed they don’t know what the f*** they’re doing. The official excuse was a 2026 profit outlook that ma...
Intel to Novo be like… It’s no secret that tech was the main card that got TKO’d yesterday. But what no one expected was the special guest that stole the show. And when I say stole the show, I mean absolutely blasted. In short, Novo said “hold my beer” as shares were nuked -15% in a single session after dropping guidance that can only be described as honest to the point of violence. Novo is now telling the market sales and profit are going backwards...
Uber: great at moving people… even better at moving takeout. The taxi-killer dropped Q4 earnings and (on paper) this thing slapped. Revenue came in at $14.37B, barely clearing estimates, but still up a chunky 20% year-over-year. Not exactly meme-stock fireworks… but solid “grown-a** company” numbers. And yet? Shares dipped anyways (which I’ll get to why in a second). The real MVP this quarter wasn’t hauling bachelorette parties down Broadway… it...
This is why we can’t have nice things… (Thanks, AI) The market has a fever and the only medicine is NOT AI. At least not today that is. Case in point: The S&P 500 slid almost 1%, the Nasdaq ate a full 1.4% faceplant, and the Dow did that annoying thing where it flirted with a new record in the morning before getting taken behind the barn and shot (falling 160 points). Live look at my portfolio today… Oh, and tech got smoked. Again. The reaso...
U.S. homebuilders are proposing a new housing idea that’s meant to ease affordability while pulling in billions of dollars from private investors. The concept has picked up the informal name “Trump Homes,” and it centers on a rent-to-own setup meant to give renters a more realistic path to buying. Builders including Lennar and Taylor Morrison have been involved in shaping the proposal. Under the basic outline, private investors would pay to build and initially own entry-leve...
Hey Siri, how do you say “Art of the Deal” in Hindi? Donnie Deels hopped on Truth Social yesterday and announced he and India’s PM Narendra Modi just “got it on” (in a good way). We have tariffs down, big numbers being thrown around, energy is suddenly rerouted… and everybody is smiling in different time zones. Bigly. In short, according to #47, reciprocal U.S. tariffs on India are dropping from 25% to 18%, effective immediately. India,...
Pour one out for the Boring Company… So it appears that Elon finally did the thing everyone assumed he wouldn’t actually do. SpaceX is folding xAI into the mothership with a new combined valuation of roughly $1.25 “WTF” trillion. (Source: Giphy) Obviously, we saw this coming soon. We just didn’t know when. But now it’s here, and now Elon is about to be insufferable again. For context, xAI has been torching cash like it’s s...
Does your investment criteria include “legacy fintechs getting pantsed by Apple Pay in real time?” Buddy, I’ve got a ticker for you… Happy earnings season to everyone except for the folks currently shaking at their desks inside PayPal HQ. Elon’s old flame just got charged back to the tune of roughly 17% off the stock, after their numbers revealed they don’t know what the f*** they’re doing. The official excuse was a 2026 profit outlook that ma...
It’s Alex Karp’s world and we’re all just living in it… The final boss of government contracting exploded 12% after dropping Q4 earnings that probably made even Michael Burry hover his cursor over the “pause” button on that Palantir is a fraud Substack draft. Turns out when everyone’s worried AI is about to eat software companies alive, Palantir would like to remind you that it is the software eating everything else. This time around, their CE...
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