Wells Fargo Finally Loses It’s Fed-Issued Ankle Monitor… Let The Greed Binge Begin…

If you ever wanted to see a bank pump their fists for finally being allowed to act like a bank again, feast your eyes on the slimiest of them all… Wells friggin’ Fargo. After seven years of being chained to a $1.95 trillion asset cap… a financial diet so strict it probably came with a Fitbit… the Feds finally let them off the leash. And naturally, investors applauded their return with a bigly 2.7% after-hours rally. F

(Source: Giphy) 

If you recall, Wells got absolutely nuked by regulators for inventing new customer accounts like they were trying to start a loyalty program for fraud. Millions of fake accounts, mortgage “errors” that ended with people getting foreclosed on for sport, and enough car insurance shadiness to make Volkswagen’s Dieselgate look amateur. With that, the penalty, from the Fed, was to freeze Wells’ assets at $1.95T in 2018. Growth was outlawed. They could watch JPMorgan balloon by $2 trillion since 2018, but all Wells could do was sit there, grounded, and think about what it did. 

(Source: Reuters) 

“Look what you did, you little jerk” - CEO Charlie Scharf, the cleanup guy JPMorgan sends in when your compliance department has become an episode of Kitchen Nightmares. Since 2019, he’s been busy purging the “heritage issues” left, right, and twice on Sunday. Eventually, the Fed finally bought it: Wells had “substantially” improved its risk programs, cleaned up its act, and passed the regulatory polygraph. Every Fed governor signed off, lifting the cap and handing Scharf his “most improved player” trophy, plus a $2,000 bonus for every full-time employee. 

So big win ehh? But what now? Apparently, No more running the business like it’s under court-ordered supervision. Credit cards, wealth management, commercial banking… everything is back on the gambling table. Investors are drooling at the prospect, portfolio managers are already writing “overweight” notes, and analyst types are waving around the words “reputational boost” like it’s some kind of unicorn blood. Of course, Wells still has a few regulatory baby monitors left, but the main shackle is gone.

(Source: Giphy) 

On the other hand, not everyone is thrilled. America’s Karen and Chief, Senator Elizabeth Warren nearly combusted on live TV, calling the Fed’s move “an outrageous giveaway to one of Wall Street’s most derelict banks.” (Strong words, but at least she didn’t demand the bank be turned into a Subway franchise this time.) But here’s the thing, while Wells was in time-out, the rest of the U.S. banking giants just kept getting fatter. JPMorgan, Bank of America, PNC… trillions in new assets, with no restrictions. That’s cruel punishment for a cesspool bank that eats, sleeps, and breaths greed. 

But now that they are back in the game, investors should expect growth, expansion, and… if history’s any guide, the occasional headline that makes compliance officers get horned up. Give it six months until we see some more skeletons in the closet. But alas, in the end, Wells Fargo just got the green light to make up for seven years of lost growth. The party’s back on, friends. Now let’s see what they do with it. Meaning, keep your eyes on Wells and place your bets accordingly. Until next time… 

P.S. $27K to feel like a big shot?

Personal story: When I started investing, the only “edge” I had was the fantasy of selling a kidney for Bloomberg Terminal money. Seriously, that’s what Wall Street expects you to cough up… twenty-seven grand for the privilege of watching news break a few minutes before the rest of the peasants.

Which makes sense, especially considering that by the time retail traders even sniff that info, the real money’s already been made. The suits have already vacuumed up the opportunity while everyone else is left buying tops, bag-holding, and rage-posting on Reddit. I learned that the hard way… but after I finally wised up about what the Bloomberg Terminal actually is. Spoiler: it’s finance’s version of slapping a Chanel label on a bottle of Febreze. It’s not about the data. It’s about knowing where to get it before some hedge fund manager with a cocaine addiction and racked up child support front-runs your trade.

This is exactly why Stocks.News exists. Seriously. The days of mortgaging your future or harvesting organs just to keep up with the Wall Street greed bags are over. Now it’s time to get the same real-time, unfiltered news flow the pros get… without the “bend over and take it” annual fee. All the ammo, none of the institutional gatekeeping.

Translation: It’s time to dump the $20k+ price tag with yesterday’s lunch. You want actionable news before its ancient history? Stocks.News premium costs less than whatever sad desk salad corporate America is eating right now. Meaning here’s where you stop getting played… and start winning. Click here to join Stocks.News premium and finally clinch your seat at the big kids’ table. 

Stocks.News does not hold positions in companies mentioned in the article.