United’s Scott Kirby Tells AI Agents to ‘Kirb Your Enthusiasm,’ Bans Bots From Booking Flights

Old man yells at cloud chatbot.

United Airlines just went all Dikembe Mutombo on your AI agent. On Wednesday, the airline said it’s cutting off the bots that book trips for travelers, all to protect its margins customers.

Now, per United’s updated contract of carriage (read: the fine print), “the use of AI Agents to make, modify or service a Ticket” is officially banned, even if you personally gave the bot your blessing. United can also cancel any reservation a bot makes. The crackdown covers its own website and app, plus travel agencies and aggregators (think: Expedia), with changes to its booking, ticketing and distribution policies on the way. Your AI can still look at flights and fares. Look, but no touching.

United’s reasoning? Something about handing a bot your MileagePlus login and credit card. What’s the worst that could happen? Per United: exposed personal info, plus “unintended purchases, account changes, or use of MileagePlus miles.” The airline also says bots handling stuff like check-in could break FAA and DOT rules, since a human has to confirm their bag doesn’t contain explosives.

United: “Does your bag contain explosives?”

Your AI agent: “Great question!”

To be fair, United isn’t totally wrong. Back in September, Meta’s agent Muse handled a Facebook Marketplace sale for a tech YouTuber, took a lowball offer, and gave the buyer his home address. Woof. And in August, Delta’s own AI concierge rug-pulled a Platinum Medallion’s flight home after she asked it to drop one leg of her trip.

It’s just that Scott Kirby (who pitched Donny Dealmaker a yuge United-American merger back in February) told a Chicago crowd on Tuesday, “To be honest, I don’t want to create another middleman.” Tell us what you really think, Scott.

In other words, a bot doesn’t fall for the Economy Plus upsell (unlike you and me), and sooner or later it wants a cut. Friendly reminder, in 2020, United valued MileagePlus at $21.9B, roughly double what the entire airline was worth on the stock market at the time. No chatbot is getting anywhere near Kirby’s Scrooge McDuck pool of miles.

Meanwhile, the rest of corporate America can’t decide whether to let the bots in. Amazon c*ckblocked Muse in September, claiming the agent captures and stores customers’ log-ins. Mr. Steal Your Girl Data (read: Mark Zuckerberg) says his bot doesn’t do that. Expedia and Booking, meanwhile, are already working with OpenAI. And Walmart went the open-relationship route and partnered with Muse.

Turns out the only middleman Kirby’s letting on board is the poor b*stard stuck in 34E. Place your bets accordingly, friends…

Until next time! 

 

At the time of publishing, Stocks.News holds positions in United Airlines, Meta, and Amazon as mentioned in the article.