The Final Tally: Wall Street Panics as Trump Nukes Markets After-Hours…

Well, the markets had themselves a real “Don’t worry, I’ve got this” moment—that is, before it careening straight into a wall. The S&P 500 started the day rough down more than 1% mid session, but somehow managed to claw its way back and close green (+0.67%), locking in its third consecutive gain. The Nasdaq and Dow weren’t far behind, each inching higher +0.87% and +0.56%, respectively. However, once the closing bell rang, Trump dropped the “T” word and all hell broke loose (we’ll get to that). 

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In other news, Tesla jumped 5.3%, mainly because of a report that floated the idea that Musk’s role as one of Trump’s top whisperers could be winding down. Musk, obviously, rage-posted on X calling it “fake news.” But the market didn’t care—just the possibility that he might stop LARPing as a political strategist was enough to pump the stock. That’s how desperate things are. Amazon (+2%) also got dragged into the day’s chaos with rumors it’s sniffing around TikTok’s U.S. ops. No confirmation from Jassey’s camp, but the idea of Amazon owning your grocery orders, your cloud infrastructure, and your algorithmically curated thirst traps is definitely a Big Tech fever dream. 

Elsewhere, Newsmax reminded everyone what happens when you let meme stock logic infect the real world. After exploding 2,230% in two days of trading—because why the hell not—the stock cratered 77% Tuesday. If you bought at the top, congrats, you're now the proud owner of a tax write-off and a new career path. 

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But of course, everything got worse after-hours. In short, Trump decided to remind everyone he’s still very much capable of nuking global markets in a single sentence. The president announced a new wave of sweeping tariffs—minimum 10%, with room to spike higher depending on the country. Cue the after-hours bloodbath. 

For instance, the SPY dropped 2%, the QQQs got wrecked by 3.3%, and the Dow ETF shed 1%. Import-heavy names like Nike and GM got kicked in the teeth. Nvidia and Tesla, which had just staged a nice rally, gave back 3%. Just a reminder: you can’t out-meme geopolitics. Meaning, if you’re wondering what the play is tomorrow, well it’s this: keep your head on a swivel, stop pretending this is a rational market. Because it’s not. Until next time, friends… 

If you read all of this, congrats for having a 10 second attention span (better than me). As always, here’s our heatmap for today.

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Stocks.News holds positions in Tesla and Amazon as mentioned in the article.