Tesla’s Robotaxi Was a “Success” Despite the Grand Theft Auto Experience…

Tesla’s robotaxi debut in Austin went about as smoothly as you’d expect when you’ve delayed it a Bonnie Blue amount of times. Elon Musk called it a ‘successful’ launch, Wall Street called it an 8% gain, and the cars? Well, let’s just say they weren’t exactly giving ‘model citizen’ energy. 

(Source: Giphy) 

Within hours of the debut, the internet was flooded with videos of Tesla’s driverless Model Ys pulling off moves that would make a high school driver’s ed teacher reach for the Xanax. One robotaxi drifted over a double yellow in a left-turn lane, then sheepishly slid back as a human driver laid on the horn. Another decided the 30 mph speed limit was more of a suggestion, clocking 39 while the influencer in the backseat cheered it on like they were at Daytona.

(Source: New York Post) 

And in true Tesla fashion, the “successful” part of this rollout seems to be that nobody ended up on a stretcher. The National Highway Traffic Safety Administration saw the viral clips and immediately started poking around, but Tesla’s already playing the “that’s confidential business info” card. Classic. If you ever wanted a real-life example of “move fast and break things,” this is it. 

(Source: CNBC) 

And yet, the amazing part is that none of this mattered to investors. Like, at all. Tesla shares absolutely melted faces, presumably because any kind of robotaxi that WASN’T a delay was a successful one. The first batch of robotaxi riders were basically a Tesla cesspool of YouTubers, superfans, and guys who still make Dogecoin their entire personality. Additionally, the reviews came in with statements like “smooth as butter”, “Indistinguishable from a normal Uber”, and “Now do it everywhere.” Which is all fine and dandy, but they completely ignore the part where the car was occasionally freestyling the traffic code. 

Regardless though, Elon is going to Elon with this. The man knows he’s late to the party as Waymo’s been running actual robotaxis in multiple cities for years, and the Chinese AV mafia is already lapping everyone else in raw numbers. But he still believes he can pump out “hundreds of thousands” of robotaxis by next year. Bold strategy Cotton, let’s see if it pays off for ‘em.  For now though, the service is limited to a sliver of Austin, costs $4.20 a ride (because of course it does), and has a human “safety monitor” riding shotgun in case the car tries to get creative. And if it rains? Sorry, the future is postponed until further notice. 

(Source: Giphy) 

In the end, despite the occasional road rage of the robotoxi’s themselves, investors are high on Musk’s hopium, regulators are sharpening their pencils, and the rest of us are just hoping Austin’s pedestrians have good reflexes. Of course, we’ll see how this morning’s price action plays out… maybe we’ll get some more mooning, maybe we won’t. In the meantime though, keep your eyes on more robotaxi updates and place your bets accordingly. Until next time, friends… 

At the time of publishing, Stocks.News holds positions in Tesla as mentioned in the article.