Tesla Files Urgent California Permit to Keep Empty Robotaxi Dreams Alive—Smoke and Mirrors?

Another day, another story that involves Elon friggin’ Musk. This time, Tesla just applied to roll out a ride-hail service in California—and surprise surprise, even though some Californians may be salivating at the fact this may be the official “All Systems Go” leading to a Cybercab picking them up from In-and-Out at 2 in the morning—it’s absolutely not. Why? Because as usual with Elon, there’s a catch. 

(Source: Giphy) 

Simply put, this isn’t the sexy, futuristic "no-human-needed" permit everyone is dreaming about. Instead, Tesla applied for what's called a Transportation Charter-Party Carrier (TCP) permit. Translation: It’s basically Tesla running its own taxi-service, using company-owned cars driven by actual human employees. So basically Uber? Yeah, pretty much… 

Now the reason for the permit filing is that while Elon’s autonomous goal is still very much there, the problem is California regulators don't screw around when it comes to autonomous cars. For more context, there's a gauntlet of SIX different permits Tesla needs before they can legally unleash self-driving taxis on the public. And right now, Tesla has exactly one out of six LOL. The best part? They’ve literally never used it. 

(Source: Forbes) 

For instance, this is precisely what Tesla's permit situation looks like right now:

• DMV Autonomous Vehicle Testing Permit (with safety driver): Tesla has this, but reports exactly zero autonomous testing miles every year. Definitely reassuring.
   
• DMV Testing Permit (no safety driver): Nope. Not even close.
   
• DMV Operation Permit (no safety driver): This is the infamous permit Cruise royally screwed up last year, leading to regulators curb-stomping their robo-fleet into oblivion.
   
• CPUC Human-Driven Ride Service Permit: This is the one Tesla just applied for in November 2024. Buuuut, shocker, it’s still pending. 
   
• CPUC Autonomous Vehicle Fareless Permit: Still missing. Tesla would need all previous permits to even apply. Plus, no charging passengers. (And as we all know, Elon would rather eat broken glass than offer free rides.)
   
• CPUC Autonomous Vehicle Ride Service Permit (charging fares): The holy grail and still a distant fantasy in a galaxy far, far away.

Also, keep in mind that these permits don’t even include the other federal hoops like NHTSA’s safety standards, which Tesla historically treats as optional "suggestions." So yeah, that’s where we are with this whole Robotaxi shindig. 

(Source: Giphy) 

However, in peak Musk style, Elon's already "promised" that Tesla will launch an unsupervised robotaxi service in Austin this June. Why Texas? Because regulators there give exactly zero sh^ts. If your autonomous Cybercab goes rogue and yeets itself onto I-35, Texas's response is probably just a shrug and an invite to the next BBQ.

Adding to the problem here is that Tesla’s FSD v13 reportedly needs critical driver interventions roughly every 400 miles. Compare that dumpster fire to Waymo’s recent innovation—where insurance auditors clocked them at 2.3 million miles between at-fault incidents—and you can see the gaping gap Elon is dealing with. Oh and before you ask, Tesla conveniently refuses to release comparable data. Transparency? Never heard of her.

(Source: Giphy) 

For this reason, I’m definitely starting to see a trend form and that trend is that investors aren’t buying Elon’s B.S. anymore. This week has been a prime example of it as Tesla stock has been getting absolutely bodied lately (down -23.62% MTD). 

Meaning, Tesla finally applying for this ride-hailing permit is basically Elon admitting he can't completely ignore California regulators. But even if we side-swiped California for a minute, Tesla is still quite a long ways away from unleashing actual robotaxis nationwide. So until real-world results start to show up, the permits just prove as another distraction to keep the hopium alive. 

For now, keep your eyes on Tesla and continue to watch Elon’s next move with this thing. As always, stay safe and stay frosty, friends! Until next time… 

P.S. My buddy Jared is sharp as hell—probably one of the smartest guys I know. But when it comes to investing? An absolute clown. Why? Because he doesn’t grasp the one thing that separates winners from losers in the market: information. And not just any information—I’m talking about the kind of intel that Wall Street hoards like the FBI hoards Hunter Biden's laptop—because the second retail traders get their hands on it, their edge starts to disappear.

Moral of the story here? Don’t be a Jared. Get access to the real market-moving data, the stuff hidden behind paywalls and institutional gatekeeping by joining Stocks.News premium. At the end of the day, the market isn’t playing fair—so why should you? 

Stocks.News holds positions in Tesla and Uber as mentioned in the article.