Elon Hijacks Tesla’s Earnings Call to Pitch $1 Trillion Robot Army (Says Quiet Part Out)

Find someone who looks at you like Elon Musk looks at total global domination.

Because the man of many children is now demanding a $1 trillion “compensation package” to stay at Tesla… and we finally know why. Turns out, it’s because he wants to fund what he literally called his “robot army.” And yes, he actually said that out loud. On Tesla’s earnings call. With investors listening. 

Now I know what you’re thinking: “Tesla must’ve had a massive quarter for Elon to feel confident enough to drop something that wild… right?”
But nope. Profits dropped roughly 40% year-over-year, missing analyst estimates despite record car deliveries (thanks to the tax loophole expiring). Revenue landed at $25.7 billion, a modest gain, but margins took a beating… down from 17.9% to 14.1%. So yeah, not exactly “trillion-dollar army” territory.

(Source: New York Times)

Anyways, back to the $1T ask, Tesla’s board is asking shareholders to bless a package that would hand Musk more control than most Presidents and Kings around the world. His reasoning? He says he needs the power to steer Tesla’s AI and robotics future. Specifically, to make sure he’s not “ousted” after he “builds this enormous robot army.”

Now normally when a CEO mentions “building a robot army,” you’d assume it’s a metaphor… like Jeff Bezos saying “we’re automating the future, not literally assembling an army of metal warehouse soldiers. But no. Elon said it with a straight face. Honestly, it sounded like something ripped straight from Impractical Jokers: Joe, Sal, Murr, and Q in his earpiece, barely holding it together after telling him to say “robot army” on a live earnings call.

But you have to give Elon some credit, after realizing how insane it sounded, he tried to walk it back, saying he didn’t want to control the army… just have a “strong influence” over it. Which, for the record, is exactly what every Mission Impossible villain says right before pressing the big red button. Remember, Tesla’s humanoid robot, Optimus, is already doing scripted kung-fu demos and popcorn deliveries. So the line between “cute productivity bot” and “Skynet intern” is getting thinner by the day.

Naturally, big-money investors aren’t exactly giddy about handing a trillion dollars’ worth of voting power to a guy who is already the richest person in the world. So when proxy advisors ISS and Glass Lewis recommended a “no” vote, Musk lost it. On the call, he called them “corporate terrorists.”

He then launched into a full-blown rant about passive index funds, governance, and how “outsiders don’t get it.” Which is ironic, considering that’s what most shareholders say right before unloading their stock. Behind all the theatrics, Musk’s trying to fix a self-inflicted problem. He used to own more of Tesla… but he sold billions in shares to buy Twitter (now X). 

Now he’s trying to rebuild that control by convincing shareholders that his personal influence somehow equals “safety” for the future of Tesla’s AI. It’s going to be wild to see if this thing actually gets approved.

But you know what? Credit where it’s due… at least Elon said the quiet part out loud. “I need a trillion dollars to raise up my robot army to rule the world… I mean, have strong influence.”

We’re always complaining that billionaires never tell us what they’re really thinking. Well, here’s one out here saying it with his whole chest.

At the time of publishing this article, Stocks.News holds positions in Tesla as mentioned in the article.