Amazon Goes Full Crocodile Dundee on Australia’s Data Center Farms…

Amazon just went down… under. With $13 billion in one hand, and an ecommerce monopoly in the other… Amazon just announced it’s about to inject nearly $13 billion straight into Australia’s digital veins. Why? Because the only thing more thirst-inducing than Outback Steakhouse’s Bloomin’ Onion is AI workloads running all day erryday. 

(Source: Giphy) 

In short, Amazon is throwing down a brinks truck worth of Australian dollars (read: A$20 billion… $13 billion U.S.) between 2025 and 2029 to build, expand, and maintain enough data center infrastructure to make every other tech CEO’s hairline recede a little faster. Meaning, server capacity, turbocharged AI compute, and presumably a fresh batch of generative AI hallucinations will all be provided courtesy of Andrew Jassey and his merry band down in the land of Kangaroos. 

(Source: Reuters) 

In addition, they even tossed in three new solar farms, measuring 170 megawatts of clean-ish power, all to support the relentless growth of AWS, which is basically the digital landlord for half the global economy at this point. The crazy part? This is… *checks notes* the biggest tech investment Australia’s ever seen (and that includes every failed crypto exchange and NFT kangaroo ever created).

Naturally, Australia’s Prime Minister, Albanese, immediately took to X to call it “a huge vote of confidence” in the Aussie economy”. The reality? Amazon could give a flying f**k about Australia. As of right now, they are in a full blown cold war with Microsoft and Google for AI dominance, and Australia is just another pawn on the “Risk” map that’s open for business. Case in point: In the last month alone, Amazon’s thrown $20 billion at Pennsylvania, $10 billion at North Carolina, and $5 billion at Taiwan… all to build more server farms. Translation: Every petabyte Amazon hoovers up in these new regions is another customer who’ll need a crowbar (or a royal commission) to pry their data back out. The more AWS regions, the deeper the moat, and the juicier their recurring cloud margins.

(Source: Giphy) 

Moral of the story here? Amazon has made it abundantly clear that if youre not long on cloud, you’rs short the future. AWS is pile driving it’s way to AI dominance as the digital backbone of the southern hemisphere, and you’d better believe they’re going to charge rent for every byte that crosses it. Meaning, keep your eyes on any more data center splurges and place your bets accordingly. Until next time, friends…

At the time of publishing, Stocks.News holds positions in Amazon, Microsoft, and Google as mentioned in the article.