Ah, the sweet poetic justice of the written word. I guess my bashing of all the stock market pessimists really did make its way to JP Morgan’s sell side trading desk after all (refer to yesterday’s article for ironic context).  

(Source: Giphy) 

Because as if I wrote the story myself, JP Morgan’s chief global markets strategist (and biggest bear on the books), Marko Kolanovic, is officially packing his bags after a rather tumultuous two-year stint. 

(Source: Bloomberg) 

Now of course, you might be wondering why this is big news, so I’ll explain it plainly: Imagine being the weatherman who predicts rain every day during a year-long drought. That's been the story of Kolanovic’s whole fear mongering vibes lately, and now, JP Morgan has had enough of it. 

(Source: Facebook) 

You see, Kolanovic's departure isn’t exactly shocking to those who've been following his market calls. The guy is as bad as Cathie Wood and Jim Cramer when it comes to his predictions. 

For instance, back in 2022 the S&P 500 took a nosedive, dropping nearly 20%. And while most Wall Street strategists were adjusting their expectations and telling investors to brace themselves, Kolanovic was out here with his pom-poms, cheering for a market rebound that didn’t happen. It was like betting on the underdog when the score was clearly 0-50 in the 4th quarter. Are you even paying attention dude? 

(Source: Business Insider) 

Yet, as if he didn’t get enough backlash to shut him up, fast forward to the end of that dreadful year, Kolanovic finally switched gears and went full bear mode. Unfortunately for him, that’s precisely when the market decided to pull a phoenix and rise from the ashes. The S&P 500 ended up soaring 24% in 2023 and has pretty much kept going up since (16%+ YTD). 

(Source: Yahoo Finance) 

Which brings us to today. The bulls are not only running wild, but investors have had enough of the doomsday prophecies.  Literally, no one wants to hear the sky is falling, especially when the cold hard data says otherwise (Again, refer here to see why) . With the S&P 500 trading above 5,500, JP Morgan’s dismal 4,200 target for 2024 sticks out like a sore thumb. 

Which is why it’s not super surprising to see Kolanovic’s ultra-bearish forecast become a bit of a running joke in trading circles. In fact, I’d be surprised if there wasn’t a strategy called “Inverse-Kolanovic” like there has been for Jim Cramer. 

(Source: The Street) 

So, what’s next for JP Morgan? Well with Kolanovic exploring “other opportunities,” Hussein Malik is stepping up as the solo head of global research. And Dubravko Lakos-Bujas will take on the role of chief market strategist. Simply put, it’s clear the bank is hitting the reset button with hopes of saving its reputation. 

(Source: Giphy) 

Kolanovic’s departure marks the end of a bearish chapter in JP Morgan’s playbook. The market gods have spoken, and they’re clearly favoring the bulls. 

So if there’s one takeaway from Kolanovic’s bearish demise, it's this: if you’re going to make predictions publicly, you might want to make sure you have your facts and data checked. 

(Source: Imgur) 

Because at the end of the day, the market doesn’t care about any of our predictions. It does what it wants, when it wants. And right now, it’s in a bullish mood. So, if you’re still clinging to bearish forecasts, maybe it’s time to loosen the grip. 

In the end, JP Morgan’s decision to part ways with Kolanovic feels like a nod to the current market sentiment. Investors are riding the bull wave, and there's little room for naysayers. As Mark Twain famously said (and we love to repeat), “History doesn’t repeat itself, but it often rhymes.” For now, the rhyme is bullish, and Kolanovic’s bearish verse is no longer in tune.

Sorry ‘boutcha! 

Stocks.News holds no positions in companies mentioned.