Let me tell you, there aren’t many things worse than a bad accountant. I’ve been there (tax penalties, missed filings, you name it). But at least my accountant wasn’t steering a $14.6 billion company into a historic stock crash. Symbotic, the Walmart-backed AI warehouse technology company, seems to have found its accounting team on UpWork, and the results are… Well, let’s just say they’re “UpWorklike”.

Yesterday, Symbotic’s stock face-planted 40%, shaving off $7.3 billion in market value. The culprit? A press release full of corporate-speak gems like “material weaknesses” and “errors in revenue recognition.” In normal-person English: they’ve been cooking the books, and not in the fun, Gordon Ramsay way. Their annual report is delayed because someone forgot how to math.

Symbotic found multiple issues with how they recognized revenue. Apparently, they’ve been expensing costs tied to milestone achievements before actually hitting those milestones. That’s like throwing a graduation party halfway through freshman year of Med School (it’s premature, confusing, and probably going to backfire).

Oh, and it gets better. They also discovered they can’t bill for certain cost overruns on deployments, meaning their revenue was inflated in multiple quarters. These blunders took a wrecking ball to their gross profit, adjusted EBITDA, and net income. As a result, the company revised its Q1 2025 outlook, slicing revenue projections to $480-$500 million (down from $495-$515 million) and cutting EBITDA estimates almost in half to $12-$16 million.

The market reaction was swift and violent (sort of like my dad’s golf swing). Shares tanked 38% by the close, with analysts like DA Davidson downgrading the stock from “Buy” to “Neutral” and trimming price targets to $35. The problem isn’t just the numbers (although, yikes). It’s the deeper issue: Symbotic’s internal controls are about as sturdy as a two legged stool.

And let’s not forget, this isn’t their first accounting faceplant. Just two weeks ago, they had to restate quarterly figures because of other mistakes. At this point, you have to wonder if Symbotic’s accounting team are the real life characters off of Dumb and Dumber.

Despite the chaos, there’s still some upside to the Symbotic story. Their AI-powered warehouse systems remain cutting-edge, and partnerships with heavyweights like Walmart Mexico continue to pad their backlog to the tune of $400 million. But let’s be honest… no amount of AI tech can fully distract from accounting errors that make amateur tax prep look competent.

Either way, here’s hoping Symbotic ditches the UpWork accountants and invests in some serious financial talent. Or at least someone who knows how to use Excel without the Undo button.

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Stock.News does not have positions in companies mentioned.