After Friday’s market massacre, the vibe among investors has been… less than cheerful. I’ve lost count of how many times I heard “this is going lower” or “this feels just like 2008 or 2020,” especially with whispers of a new pandemic making the rounds. But today, stocks tried to claw back some losses. All in all, the Dow nudged up 0.5%, the S&P 500 squeezed out a 0.2% gain, and the Nasdaq got dragged down 0.2% thanks to Palantir’s 8% selloff on news of government budget cuts.

Of course, the real main event today is Nvidia’s earnings after the bell. Everyone’s hoping it’ll be the booster shot the market needs, though let’s be real… if it disappoints, things could get uglier than the Humpback of Notre Dame. 

Over in Washington DC, the dream of a May rate cut is still alive… barely. The odds have doubled (now at 42%), which sounds great until you realize it’s happening because consumer spending is showing cracks. In other words, the Fed might consider bailing us out, but only if things get truly disastrous (because Powell won’t just let us have nice things).

Big Tech is looking less like the Magnificent Seven and more like the Struggling Seven. These stocks have been lagging the S&P 500 all year, though a strong earnings season has softened the blow. According to the data, Q4 earnings growth for the S&P 500 is the highest in three years, with most companies beating estimates.

While tech flopped around like a fish, defensive stocks held it down. Campbell’s, Kraft Heinz, and General Mills all climbed over 2%, proving that people will always need soup and snacks. 

Over in Warren Buffett’s kingdom, Berkshire Hathaway jumped nearly 4% after reporting a 71% surge in profits, thanks to a big win in insurance (Geico really saved more than 15% this time).

On the losing side, Robinhood tanked another 2%, now down 22% since its February high. 

Meta fell over 1%, extending its five-day losing streak, and Starbucks announced it’s cutting 1,100 corporate jobs to streamline operations (aka: make investors happy).

If you read all of this, congrats for having a 10 second attention span (better than me). As always, here’s our heatmap for today.