Powell Gives Markets Middle Finger, Meta and Microsoft Melt Faces…

I would’ve paid straight cash to see Trump’s face when Powell said, “Not today”... 

The market wanted a rate cut. Powell handed it a blank stare and a reminder that he's not here to inflate 401(k)’s. Naturally, the market did what it does best when Powell gives everyone the middle finger, the S&P 500 closed down -0.12% and the Dow dropped 172 points. Meanwhile, the Nasdaq was the only one who barely showed up with a +0.15% gain. 

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To be fair, at one point, it looked like the bulls might push higher. But then Powell opened his mouth and reality came flooding back. Shocker. Oh, and he mentioned some vague warning that Trump’s tariffs might start lighting inflation back up… presumably, because he’s still big mad for Trump roasting him over the Fed’s $3 billion renovations LOL. Translation: The Fed’s still playing chicken with inflation, and the market is the nervous passenger in the backseat wondering if anyone’s actually driving. There were even two dissenters this time though… Bowman and Waller… who wanted to cut. But as you can imagine, they were kindly asked to “GTFO” by the hawks. 

As for corporate land, Spotify got body slammed for missing earnings. Shares dropped 11% yesterday, its worst single-day performance in a year. But then, shares rocketed nearly 5% today as Deutsche Bank immediately told everyone to “buy the dip,” because apparently, nothing says long-term value like a company that’s raised prices, added ads, and still can’t figure out profitability. The thesis? “Engagement is high.” Great. So is TikTok.

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Starbucks rallied 4% after its CEO claimed the turnaround is ahead of schedule. No word on whether that schedule includes serving hot coffee or not pissing off half its customer base every six months. The question alone flipped bulls to bears as shares closed –0.22%. Meanwhile, Peloton jumped nearly 19% because UBS upgraded it to “Buy,” which is bold considering most of the people I know now use their $2k bikes as laundry racks. But hey, that’s bullish for Novo Nordisk, right? Wrongo. Novo continued its vomit moment, down another -7% after gutting its guidance and swapping CEOs. As a result, Bank of America downgraded the stock to neutral. Sucks to suck. 

Elsewhere, Meta and Microsoft both reported and… *checks notes*... both melted faces off. Meta beat and raised guidance, launching the stock nearly +10% higher in extended trade, while Microsoft boomed +7% after hours. Additionally, Meta also bumped capex, which means Zuck’s still buying GPUs like he’s stockpiling for an apocalypse at his billionaire bunker. 

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Oh, and Robinhood beat earnings too, mooning +2.69% on the day. On the other hand, Arm met expectations… but guided lower. The stock barely slipped (-0.089%), as the AI narrative finally started showing stretch marks. So with all that said, where does that leave us this fine Wednesday afternoon? 

Well, the Fed’s still playing coy. The consumer’s still maxed out. AI is still (for now) the only thing keeping the Nasdaq alive. And earnings season has officially entered the part where bad news is “priced in” and good news means another 10% melt-up because we’ve collectively lost the plot. Hell yeah. Next up, we have Amazon… and whether or not Jeff Bezos’ latest $5.7 billion share sale was a smoke and mirror crystal ball. Until next time, friends… 

If you read all of this, congrats for having a 10 second attention span (better than me). As always, here’s our heatmap for today.

At the time of publishing, Stocks.News holds positions in Spotify, Amazon, Meta, Microsoft, Robinhood, and Starbucks as mentioned in the article.