“Vat are you wearing? You look poor…” - People who wear ON shoes, probably… 

ON, the Swiss sneaker brand known for its insufferable consumers… just announced it’s too rich to care about your little Black Friday rituals. The company raised guidance again after yet another monster quarter, then casually told CNBC it won’t be running holiday sales because it’s a “premium brand.” Translation: poor people don’t run fast enough to matter.

(Source: Giphy) 

Revenue for the quarter hit 794 million Swiss francs ($905 million), up 25% year-over-year and above the 763 million analysts expected. Net income jumped to 118.9 million francs from 30.5 million last year. And the stock ripped nearly 20% because of it. Meanwhile, Nike’s still trying to remember how to innovate, and Hoka’s CFO is probably on Zillow looking for a second job. But again, the real win wasn’t the numbers… it was the sorry not sorry attitude. Co-founder Caspar Coppetti literally said, “We’ll be full price through the holiday season.” Like it’s not a sneaker company, but a Swiss banking institution that happens to sell foam.

(Source: CNBC) 

They’re building a luxury brand disguised as athletic wear. The marketing playbook isn’t “move inventory,” it’s “establish dominance through scarcity.” The same logic that sells Rolexes now sells running shoes. And somehow, it’s working. Runner Hellen Obiri just broke the NYC Marathon record wearing On’s LightSpray shoes… a model literally built with… *checks notes* a spray gun. Nike invented Air. ON invented aerosol. And Wall Street loved it. 

Additionally ON raised 2025 sales guidance to 2.98 billion francs… not because it needs to, but because it can. Oh, and ONs EPS  came in at 0.47 francs, nearly double estimates of 0.25. Bigly. 

(Source: Giphy) 

So yeah… ON literally put on a masterclass on how to be objectively elite. So while every other  brand is about to set their margins on fire for Black Friday, On’s over here refusing to acknowledge the existence of the middle class. Bold strategy Cotton, let’s see how it pays off for ‘em. Until next time, friends… 

At the time of publishing, Stocks.News does not hold position in companies mentioned in the article.