Elizabeth Holmes would like a word with Donnie Cellblock…

It seems as if Sam Bankman-Fried’s long lost girl cousin… is taking a page out of his playbook.

Yes, Elizabeth Holmes, the once-mythical Silicon Valley unicorn whisperer, has officially asked Donald Trump to let her out of federal prison early. Because if there’s one thing that screams wrongfully imprisoned visionary, it’s filing a commutation request after defrauding investors out of nearly a billion dollars.

According to the Department of Justice, Holmes submitted the request last year. If approved, she could shave almost six years off her 11-year sentence and be back in the wild well before 2031… presumably with a podcast, a Substack, and (I’m hoping) another biotech scam to pitch investors on.

If you need the reminder, Holmes was convicted in 2022, reported to prison in 2023, and is currently residing at Federal Prison Camp Bryan, a minimum-security facility in Texas that’s about as cushy as it gets.

If you’re wondering what the pitch is here… no, she didn’t suddenly discover a working blood-testing machine between meal counts. The appeal appears to lean heavily on innocence and the classic history will vindicate me strategy. Her X account (which insists posts are “mostly my words, posted by others”) recently praised Trump’s health-care affordability efforts. Pandering at its finest.

(Source: Daily Mail)

And to be fair, Trump has been on an absolute clemency heater.

In just the first couple years of his second term, he’s already pardoned or commuted sentences for some high-profile figures, including Changpeng Zhao, who pleaded guilty to money laundering charges, and Ross Ulbricht (the infamous crypto hacker), who went from life sentence to freedom thanks to crypto Twitter shouting loud enough.

So Holmes is shooting her shot.

If you’re not aware… Holmes founded Theranos as a Stanford dropout and convinced the world she’d reinvented blood testing with a single finger prick. The company hit a $9 billion valuation, raised $945 million, had a YUGE partnership lined up with Walgreens… and built a board full of political figures.

There was just one problem. None of it worked.

Then John Carreyrou came into the picture and showed the world Elizabeth was a total fraud. His reporting exposed that Theranos machines weren’t doing the tests they claimed, regulators came knocking, and the whole operation folded like a lawn chair.

By 2018, Holmes was charged. By 2022, convicted. By 2023, incarcerated. And now, in 2026, she’s asking for a mulligan (presumably wearing a MAGA hat). 

The White House, of course, is keeping its mouth shut. Clemency requests are reviewed quietly, and the final call rests with the president. So Holmes either strolls out early… or her paperwork joins the pile of things Theranos promised but never delivered.

(Source: Fox News)

Either way, if Trump pardons Liz Holmes, it’s an open invitation for scammers everywhere to absolutely cook.

At the time of publishing this article, Stocks.News doesn’t hold positions in companies mentioned in the article.