Remember when claw machines would tease you with a stuffed animal, only to drop it at the last second? Well, now there’s a grown-up version: Live Nation. The parent company of Ticketmaster is the ultimate quarter-eater of the digital age, and it's making a killing doing it. (Cue the collective groans of Swifties everywhere.)

The accused scammers just dropped their Q3 numbers and wow, they’re nailing every note. We’re talking 144 million tickets sold through October (up 3%), because apparently, people will happily drop hundreds of dollars to squint at the stage from the nosebleeds.

Oh, and the profits? Up a crazy 39% for the quarter. In just three months, 50 million fans packed into venues, bringing total attendance for the year to 112 million… basically, the entire population of Mexico decided to go to concerts. And they’ve been doing it while paying 10% more per ticket than last year. 

So, who’s giving LiveNation all of this money? Drumroll, please… Gen Z. These financially carefree crazies are shelling out an average of $38 per month on live shows. And in true FOMO fashion, they’re willing to go into debt for it. According to a Credit Karma survey, 75% of Gen Zers admit they’ve gone into debt to keep up with their concert habits. Somewhere, a financial advisor just fainted.

But what about that DOJ lawsuit accusing Live Nation of monopolizing the concert industry and sneaking in hidden fees? They’re treating it like my kids treat my “last warning” about cleaning their room (nodding politely while shoving everything under the bed and calling it a day). 

Right now, CEO Michael Rapino is likely scrolling through Twitter with superhuman endurance as he brushes off the endless fan complaints about ticket prices. Despite the online outrage, Live Nation is doubling down on its “more is more” strategy, offering VIP packages that make regular tickets look like food stamps. Who needs a mortgage when you can get a premium parking spot and a half-hearted meet-and-greet. 

Looking ahead, Live Nation’s 2024 lineup is a masterclass in parting fans from their money. Shakira is set to prove her hips (and her ticket prices) don’t lie. Coldplay will be there to “fix you” for a premium, and Taylor Swift will continue her world domination, turning every concert venue into a Fed money printing factory. Fans may complain, but they’ll keep coming back, consoling themselves with the thought that they’re part of what the CEO calls the “most active concert season ever.”

Live Nation is like that restaurant with terrible Yelp reviews but a two-hour wait (I see you Cheesecake Factory) everyone complains, but everyone still shows up. With their stock up 45% YTD, they’ve proven that the best business model might just be “find what people hate but can’t live without.”

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Stock.News has positions in Live Nation and Cheesecake Factory mentioned in article.