Pour one out for the Boring Company… 

So it appears that Elon finally did the thing everyone assumed he wouldn’t actually do. SpaceX is folding xAI into the mothership with a new combined valuation of roughly $1.25 “WTF” trillion. 

(Source: Giphy) 

Obviously, we saw this coming soon. We just didn’t know when. But now it’s here, and now Elon is about to be insufferable again. For context, xAI has been torching cash like it’s speedrunning the VC lifecycle, Grok needs compute the way SpaceX needs launch windows, and Elon has been very clear for a while now that he doesn’t see these as separate companies… just separate folders.

So what does a multi-billionaire with 14 kids and four baby mamas naturally do? Vertically integrate, baby. AI doesn’t scale without compute. Compute doesn’t scale without power. Power doesn’t scale without land, permits, or leverage. Space happens to solve a lot of those problems in a way no zoning board can slow down. Meaning, the plan… stated plainly… is to get data centers in orbit where they are training models above the noise floor of Earth, both literally and regulatorily.

(Source: Bloomberg) 

This also quietly answers a question people keep pretending is philosophical but is actually logistical: how you keep xAI alive long enough to matter without begging Nvidia for mercy every quarter. SpaceX already has launch cadence, capital, Starlink cash flow, and a tolerance for burning money in service of “later.” Now xAI gets oxygen while SpaceX gets a reason to keep expanding beyond rockets and bandwidth. And yes, this perfectly tees up the mind melting IPO set to come. 

For instance, Bloomberg says the ETA on this shindig is later this year. Of course, Musk time says “eventually”. Either way, rolling xAI into SpaceX before going public does two things: it simplifies the story for public markets, and it front-loads the “AI optionality” into what will already be the largest IPO anyone’s ever tried to price without laughing. Meaning, if it works, it’s genius… if it doesn’t though, it’s still very much on brand. Translation: It’s a win-win-win situation. 

(Source: Giphy) 

Worth noting: this also sorta kinda sidelines Tesla from the AI narrative for now. Not dead, just… not the center of it. Space is where the compute is going. Cars are where the revenue already is. Different problems. Also worth noting #2: AI burning ~$1B a month becomes a lot more tolerable when your parent company launches its own infrastructure and prints satellite subscriptions. Obviously, none of this makes Grok better tomorrow… but what it does do is make xAI very hard to starve out. And that’s the point.

So yeah… Elon is gonna Elon. And we have the joy of watching it happen in real time. Meaning, keep your eyes on this story, friends. And place your bets accordingly. Until next time… 

At the time of publishing, Stocks.News holds positions in Tesla as mentioned in the article.