Bart Simpson DJT shareholders: “This is the worst day of my life.”

Homer Simpson Dow shareholders: “The worst day of your life… so far.”

Remember when Donnie Politics warned that Democrats winning Congress would trigger another Great Depression?

Apparently, what he really meant was himself and the poor bastards holding his Truth Social shares.

Because after Democrats swept both chambers of Congress Tuesday night, Wall Street responded by preparing for the breadlines throwing an absolute fucking victory parade.

The Dow Jones exploded 1,083 points (+2.1%) in Wednesday morning futures trading, as investors celebrated the prospect of divided government and Donnie Politics losing his congressional hall pass.

Meanwhile, Trump Media & Technology Group, the parent company of Truth Social, cratered 11%.

The Great Depression has officially been localized to one ticker symbol.

And considering Trump still owns approximately 41% of the company, his election-night hangover just got a whole lot more expensive.

“I predicted this would happen. Nobody predicts financial disasters better than me.” -Donnie, probably.

Of course, the financial misery didn't end at the gates of Mar-a-Lago. Wall Street's favorite AI infrastructure stocks got absolutely curb-stomped as well.

CoreWeave cratered 8%, while IREN and Nebius each surrendered another 6%.

Why, you ask?

Well, last night’s election may have just introduced the AI industry to its most terrifying opponent yet.

China.

A rogue superintelligent chatbot.

A data-center-hating democrat who doesn’t give a flying f*** about your AI portfolio.

See, not only did the jack-asses donkeys flip Congress. They also flipped several governor's mansions, including in Texas, where the incoming governor wants to hit pause on new data centers. 

Elon realizing the only place Democrats can't follow him is Mars. Probably. 

Now imagine being a CoreWeave executive who just promised investors another astronomical increase in computing capacity…

Only to discover the next governor would prefer you take your $40 billion server farm and shove it up your ass somewhere with a different ZIP code.

“Have you tried turning the state government off and back on again?”

Sadly, that presents a rather awkward problem for companies whose entire business models depend on building these facilities faster than Scam Altman can burn through another funding round.

Construction delays mean higher costs.

Higher costs mean lower margins.

And lower margins mean explaining to shareholders why their supposedly unstoppable AI investment has become a very expensive collection of GPUs sitting in a warehouse waiting for a zoning permit.

Meanwhile, the boring old blue chips were throwing an election-night victory party.

UnitedHealth climbed 1.4%, Molina Healthcare jumped 6.3%, and Centene advanced 4.7%.

HCA Healthcare gained 1.44%, while the Invesco Solar ETF surged 5%.

Investors are betting that AOC and her friends will create a friendlier environment for healthcare coverage, renewable-energy incentives, and potentially relief from Trump's aggressive tariff policies.

Even Trump appeared to acknowledge the political reality, telling the New York Times he was “absolutely willing” to accept the election results and signaling that Republicans could work with Democrats.

Character development nobody saw coming.

Of course, Democrats taking Congress doesn't mean Trump's tariffs magically disappear, and one governor can't single-handedly send the entire AI revolution to the unemployment line.

But Wall Street may have overlooked one rather important detail in its trillion-dollar AI projections.

The people living next to these data centers get a vote, too.

At the time of publishing this article, Stocks.News doesn’t hold positions in companies mentioned in the article.