As it turns out, while the rest of the world has been busy picking their jaws off the floor with a Trump re-election and a mooning Bitcoin rally, Amazon has officially figured out yet another way to siphon your cash. In short, Andy Jassy has decided to throat punch Temu and Shein right where it hurts while reminding those two degenerates who the e-comm daddy really is. 

(Source: Giphy) 

The throat punch? Amazon’s new bargain bin: Amazon Haul. This, my friends, is Amazon’s version of the dollar store, except it’s all online and you don’t have to awkwardly bump into your neighbor while buying off-brand cereal. 

(Source: The Guardian) 

In fact, everything’s priced at $20 or less—though, let’s be honest, most of it is under $10. We’re talking iPhone cases for $1.79, a set of razors for $2.99, and memory foam slippers for under $10. Because apparently, comfort has never been so cheap. And if the words “buy more, save more” make you tingle in some weird way, you’re in luck. Amazon’s practically begging you to go wild with 5% off orders over $50 and a 10% discount for those who really commit and hit $75. Meaning, it’s almost like they’re trying to see just how much random stuff you can cram into your cart just to give Temu and Shein the middle finger.

(Source: ABC) 

Which is definitely understandable on Amazon’s part. These two overseas sweatshops that provide millionaire style fashion (and a few tears from the laborers who made them) for less than a Starbucks have been sliding into Amazon's market share. Translation: Temu and Shein have “F’d around” and now they are going to find out. 

For instance,  Dharmesh Mehta, Amazon’s VP of Worldwide Selling Partner Services stated: “Finding great products at very low prices is important to customers.” Of course, this is more diplomatically put then what they are actually feeling, but still this just screams they are looking to undercut the competition, and they’ve got their A-to-Z Guarantee to make sure your $2 phone case doesn’t give you lead poisoning in the process. 

(Source: Le Monde) 

What’s more is that Amazon Haul isn’t catering to your Prime addiction either. Nope, this is a mobile-only deal, which is perfect for when you’re scrolling through your phone, bored, and just waiting for something more exciting in your life to happen. The only catch though is that the shipping times are up to two weeks. Yep no more two day Prime deliver magic here. But hey, when you’re paying next to nothing for cheap kitchen accessories you don’t need or five pairs of socks, can you really complain? Probably. But will you? Probably not.

But, what about the brands though? Yeah, none of that nonsense here. Simply put, if you’re shopping on Amazon Haul, you’re only here for one thing and one thing only: deals. And deals that save you money. That’s it. Not name brand sh*t. 

(Source: Giphy) 

In addition, if you somehow manage to regret buying that $1.99 stretch belt, Haul’s got a return policy that covers items over $3. Meaning, you’ve got 15 days to change your mind, and with over 8,000 drop-off points—including Whole Foods, Amazon Lockers, UPS, and Staples—sending back your latest impulse buy is easier than ever. Good news for you, bad news for me (And if you’ve been reading these pieces from me for a while… you know why). 

In the end though, this isn’t exactly a bold new move for Amazon. It’s more like a “Fine, we’ll play your game” response to their competitors who are stealing customers. So with Amazon Haul, they are looking to lure back the bargain hunters before they get too comfortable shopping elsewhere.

(Source: Giphy) 

Now is this a little too late for Amazon? Maybe, especially since Haul might end up cannibalizing some of Amazon’s own better margin sales, but hey, as one analyst put it, “Better that Amazon cannibalizes its own sales than lose out to rivals.” Honestly, touché.

As for the stock, Amazon is clearly on a tear, up 41.67% YTD (down -0.84% at the time of this writing). And it’s also clear that they are the OG force to be reckoned with. Meaning, if they are going after a competitor… any betting man would place their hand on Amazon, nonetheless.

Of course, do what you will with that information, but you know the drill: Keep an eye on Amazon and place your bets accordingly. In the meantime, stay safe and stay frosty, friends! Until next time…

P.S. Life comes at you fast friends, and while your favorite online stock guru is out here struggling to make heads or tails on the markets short-term direction - our team and our premium members at Stocks.News are absolutely CRUSHING it. How so? Well it all comes down to back-to-back-to-back-to-back-to-back massive wins over the last few weeks. Don’t believe me? Click here to see for yourself once we drop our next alert. 

Stocks.News does not hold positions in Amazon as mentioned in the article.